Killers of the Illuminati tripping on Aquatic centipede

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Altering reality in the wrong way?

All of mi adult life, i seem to have avoided normal reality. By that, i mean a lot of things, But mostly an aversion to being just me, with no additional things to change it.  i appear to have an addictive personality, or so i have been told.. For many years now i have avoided being 'normal' ..but why?  i seem to do everything to 'alter' mi 'perception' that i can possibly do. Why?  i have to admit that it's got a lot less lately, but it's still there. i don't really understand why i do it. Especially since recently there really seems to be no reason for it at all.  Is it just a habit? It's always been a problem, not for me of course, these things never are, but for mi family. thoughts on this would be very much appreciated.


  • I am not a psychotherapist. So I can't tell you. But the way I know good psychotherapists and psychiatrists (and not all of them are good in what they do) they'd probably just tell you: If it doesn't cause any problems, go on! In recent years I found out or rather finally became aware of that my IQ is unusually high. Not many people in the population have got such a high IQ or a higher one. There were times when I wasn't aware of this fact but often felt different, also wanted to appear different. Hey, reason for this was, I was! Could be the same reason in your case. But you'd have to test that to know. You'd have to go through psychological testing and analysis to find out. But I guess in this case there's even the risk that psychologists go wrong depending on what models they'd use on you.

    P.S.: A high IQ does never guarantee you'll always be right. That's a misconception of many gifted people.

  • I'm not sure they ever got it right in the past. It seems to me that psychology in the usual sense, misses out a lot of other factors. In mi case though, I am pretty sure IQ would really have nothing to do with it. Although I have not had any sort of test, I am really not that intelligent. at least not in the widely accepted sense. It would appear, that even intelligence can be measured in more than one way, or so I have been told, it could well be true.

  • Altered stages of consciousness can be seen as the part of shamanic/ magical path. Recently it has been determined that experience of ecstasy is the core shamanic experience, however you can experience lots of different trances etc. It happens to me regularly few times a week. To me this is normal I am not sure what other "normal" state of consciousness is, either i never experienced it or i forgot how it felt

    When you say, you like altering of you perception, do you mean you like changes? I was recently discussing it with my partner- if you keep the same state of mind for too long, it leads to stagnation. This is why people who abuse drugs don't feel high after long periods of intoxication. When "high" becomes your everyday life, it doesn't cause enough change to be interesting any more.

    The nature of Universe is Change

  • Thanx Hippi, I believe you just answered mi question. Yes, it is because I like continuous change.. and yes, it has become a habit, as I really no longer need to do it :-D

  • I love changing things in my life all the time but I always notice some patterns to the changes too and I feel they rather come to me from 'outside'. There are busy, intense times when I socialize a lot followed by quiet times when I spent most of my time alone or with close friends only. I welcome both and if I feel it's too quiet or too busy and it makes me tired I sort of know that soon the opposite will come again.

    Sometimes I make decisions to change things but it rarely goes 'according to the plan'. Few years ago I moved to a big city because I felt that I want to have more active lifestyle and meet more people. What I found after some time living here is that I actually do not connect to 'city' people so well and recently I have lots of quiet time. I got to conclusion that to socialize I need a small group rather than crowd and smaller city up north would probably suit me better. So there is another big change coming to my life as I'm going to move city again some time next year. I feel that I can't help living a little crazy life. It must be something in me too.

  • What does crazy mean?... I don't think you are crazy, some folk might, but maybe a lot of the tiem they get crazy mixed up with different. I donk know. I think perhaps, if someone thinks a certain way, and/or does certain things that makes them noticeably different from others around them, they are very likely to be 'labelled' crazy.... or at the very least slightly eccentric! Seems like you are changing again. moving to another place... (physically this tiem!) I find the same with big city places, maybe it could be the way city people have come to be, and the way they now think, that makes it harder to connect. I have noticed that most people seem to prefer a smaller company rather than many. .. I would guess it's the best way to socialise. I can understand the Pattern in the changes that you spoke of, I always imagine it to be maybe like fractals.... going inwards when we are alone, or maybe with a dear friend, and outwards when we interact with a few people, and meet new ones.

  • I suppose crazy does simply means different than majority or ourselves although most of people do not realise it. I don't truly think of myself as crazy but I know some people see me that way, especially if they don't understand my decisions.

    My grandparents were always a subject for the gossip in my family and so was my mum because they were different. Although I do suspect my granny to be mad -She wakes up in the middle of the night screaming and she hallucinates things, but she is rationalising them to herself. She said once that she woke up in the night and seen jungle growing around the room. She walked in between branches making her way to the loo but she knew these were a hallucination so she just ignored it. Then she said it must have been not enough oxygen reaching her brain. Most of people would freak out but she just sees it as getting old. I am not sure if this really is ageing but she seems fine that way. She was always afraid of psychiatrists as well, although she is not diagnosed with any disorder. I wonder if it's because she knows she could be.

    I think most people are in some way 'crazy' and that is a good thing. It makes life more interesting.

    I like the comparison of the pattern in changes to a fractal. That's very accurate.

  • It's not surprising that if no two snowflakes are the same, then something as complex as humans are never the same either. I find it amazing to realise that people cannot truly be comparable to each other psychologically, in any way. as each persons 'reality' is different, therefore each persons truth must also be different. Your nan seems like a very together person to me. I would guess that she would far sooner deal with her situation... her way, than give it over to the 'experts'. She obviously trusts her intuition. I am not at all sure if being 'noticeably' different is genetic, or merely down to the fact that you are a lot more likely to be subjected to unusual ideas when younger... difficult to tell. I have noticed, that although nobody is by any means the same, people always use similar ideas and beliefs to group themselves together. They are useful for a sense of belonging, and to learn and impart ideas about the mutual subject. as well as appearing to still be a fundamental need of the outward psyche. It's been said that no man is an island... And a lot of ideas are based on the assumption that we are all parts of the one concsiousness. i cant help wondering though.. Could it be simply because he has chosen to build bridges?

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